Joie de vivre

To my future husband…

I’m not perfect. Nor will I ever be. Please don’t expect this of me. I will try to return that favor.

I cry, not very often, but when I do, it’s something awful. Sometimes though, I cry for no reason at all, I don’t expect you to understand it but I do hope you’ll be there just to let me cry into your chest.

Falling in love with me means you’re falling in love with all of me. Not just the pieces that you like. There’s going to be stuff about me that you’re going to hate. That’s okay. Just tell me. I want to know, even when it hurts. There’s going to be things about you that bother me, but I’m not going to let that stop me from falling in love with you.

I fall in love fast. It’s a trait about myself that I ~~hate~~ loathe - because I have gotten hurt many times. So I’m going to hold back alot at first. Probably for a long time. But don’t let that deter you, because holding it back is going to make it that much stronger when I finally know what my feelings mean.

Despite my aggressive nature, I really don’t like to fight. I just don’t like to be wrong, which is something I’m learning about pride. I’m laying that down. So there’s going to be flaws in me that you dislike, but they’re things I dislike also, so you can guarantee that I’m going to try and change those things. I just ask for your patience so I don’t have to add one more item to my never ending list of worries.

If you have something to say. Say it.

Don’t beat around the bush because that only makes things harder to understand.

I don’t expect you to fully trust me immediately, because I won’t trust you initially, either. Just don’t be afraid to say something, don’t worry that it might offend me, chances are, I was thinking it, too.

There’s one more thing I would really like to ask of you. Please be a leader. For me.

Love Jesus with your whole heart. Love Jesus before you love me; because if you love me more than Jesus, how do you know how to love? Love Jesus, then me. I won’t be offended if you spend alot of time in your Bible or in prayer because that’s making you stronger. Plus I need a good kick in the rear from time to time because I can fall behind on my quiet time and prayer. Be a leader because that’s what God calls you to be as a husband.

And another thing. Spur me to be a Proverbs 31 woman. That is something I wish to accomplish in my life. One of my greatest goals.

I think I’ve poured out just about enough of my heart.

Love Always,
Your incredibly insecure, imperfect, future wife.

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, plans to give you a future and a hope.